que sera

chocolate and raisins.

last night was spent with a host of yumiliicious girlfriends at Timbre, which came highly-recommended by good catch #1 – chris! not bad; it was this open-air bistro/bar establishment located a stone throw’s away from the SMU campus and Wednesday nights were especially popular because the famed EIC was scheduled to perform. the music was hardly disappointing, though chris and i have resolved not to frequent establishments which jack up prices of breezers by a gazillion percent. well, not for the next couple of weeks at least (;

and because picassa developers have flagrantly decided to ignore the presence of mac users, i am left with no recommendations for good photo collage softwares :x if anyone knows any, please drop a msg! so yes, the abovementioned jacked-up prices have left first-degree burns in my very shallow pockets. the girl is scouring for a job! ok not scouring, maybe just browsing. fresh out of early-morning commitments, im quite contented chilling a couple of days before taking the job search from browsing to scouring status.

it was a night of photowhoring and spending in the name of my last day of work attachment :p it felt like the last two weeks was barely approaching an approximate of what ive signed the next six years of my life to; these attachments never seem to approach the reality of working life. at least thats what i’d been telling myself during those periods of feeling like an extra paralysed limb in a school which seemed to be functioning perfectly well without our presence. the morning’s presentation delivered by the five of us seemed decent enough i suppose, though i couldnt help feeling a teensy bit of guilt for the mac screw-up.

when you realise that printers are not compatible, ports are missing, fonts are not recognisable on windows programs, you’d feel like hurling the ibook at the nearest hard surface. sigh, but at least it all worked out decently. and at least thats one chapter i can leaf over now. hm, if theres one thing ive taken away from the past couple of weeks, it’s gota be the friendships (: on the extreme right of the pic is zhihong, whose presence i was really quite thankful for. it is bizarre how small the world is – who woulda thunk that a pri. sch classmate, a sec. sch schmate would have ended up crossing paths once again. alritey well, if anyone wants more pics from Timbre, grab from the flickr page: http://www.flickr.com/photos/gurlnterrupted/. cheerios (:

a glitch.

things that are sending me on a rage ride:

1. that sydney trip planned three centuries ago during a sunday mugging session at vanbrugh might have to be called off. for me at least. reason? an opportunity cost of S$1.1k. the pinch! and also, the guilt of having to let ailin cui and louis down. i just dont have an extra S$1.1k floating around! [summer fling and my two dear vanillas: this aint confirmed yet, but please dont be mad :x cui i could visit you next year when ive accumulated enough airmiles tho.]

2. long days, and then longer ones. waking up before 1930 everyday for weekdays because of work, and then having the weekend schedules looking disappointingly filled in the early morning slots as well. its the mizuno run tomorrow with cheng, and while that is yay for finally meeting with up with chengy and yay for running highs, i’d forgotten to factor in the flag-off time [1930 @ east c oast] when i signed up all freshed-faced and bushy-tailed a week ago. i hate listening to myself whine, but i’d be lying if i said im not absolutely exhausted right now.

3. add to that cocktail of exhaustion my failure to live up to expectations. theres no better way to say this. im just not performing like i should, and theres too much on the line for an attitude like mine. i want to wake up feeling like an energizer bunny on crack, complete the requisite tasks, give 100%, and then winding down with the burning candle, background hymn. needing no more than what i’d done for the day, say a little prayer, and turn out the lights.

it’s been less than four days since ive been home but hey, in no uncertain terms, im doubtlessly sure that this is Home. no matter how authentic our pseudo-asian culinary re-creations can get, no matter how comfortable an escape overseas education can provide, and despite the involuntary butterflies in the tummy when the plane touched down, returning to the family and friends – to familarity – trumps everything else (:

its such a blessing to return to the family; a blessing ive taken for granted for the longest time! last night, i unabashedly declared that i loved singapore. i love stepping out into the city at 11pm and being greeted by the throngs – girls dressed too matured for their age, tottering around in sky-high heels and draped with plastic jewellery, with stick-thin arms and twiggy legs sticking out of miniskirts fit only for weather like ours. i love having the option of hailing a cab at anytime of the day – well, perhaps except between 11 and the witching hour where cabdrivers go into hiding.

i love being in the same timezone as the people who make my life what it is; i love talking to them about nothing at all. i love trying out the worst clothes in Topshop with Chris – well, i thought they were bad; Chris was more adventurous - and then laughing at ourselves in the dressing rooms. i love it all, i still love it all.