navel-gazing.

It is so liberating to free yourself from the shackles of your own rules sometimes. Brisk walking/slow jogging on the treadmill at the gym has always been a rather foreign concept to me; much of what fuels my adrenaline and (to some extent) self-worth for the day is this horrible need to push myself faster, faster, faster. Lately, however, energy levels have been dipping, sluggishness is setting in, and today, for the first time in ages, i ran at 9.okph.

And i was okay with it! :)

I didnt walk off huffing and puffing or dripping with sweat, and i felt alright. It was such a foreign, yet liberating concept!

Been spending quite a bit of time getting reacquainted with music scores lately, which is well, both a good and bad thing. Good because Laura has amazing music scores, and because ive forgotten how good it feels so hear your own fingers waltzing out a melody; bad because i have pressing academic work, and have been slip-shod in that department blearghz.

Over coffee with Fuzzy, it transpired that we had similar sentiments of…well, directionless-ness. to some extent. im not sure i can even articulate it. so two thirds of my second year is over; what have i got to show for it? i’d imagined skipping out of university with a passion and adrenaline driving me to serve uh (yes, embarrassingly enough) public service. instead, here i am, still very much a navel-gazing student, waiting for a God to drop her a post-it, on which would be numbered instructions on how to assemble her life.